The things I should be cherishing

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It’s January 1st, 2016, a Friday night. What am I doing? I’m cuddled up in my bed sipping on wine, snacking, and reading a book about marriage. Next to me is a picture of the man that I love.

As the clock struck midnight,I proclaimed, “this is the year I’m getting engaged!” Because that’s the game plan.

Yea, I know, I’m that girl.

I’m anxious to get to my future and live out all of the things I’ve been pinning to my “Ideas for the Future” Pinterest board. Duh.

But in all seriousness, I was sitting here looking at my room and realizing that there are not a lot of other times in my life when I’m going to sit in my big, comfy bed, having quiet reading time like this.

It scares me to think that I am looking forward to the future so much that I’m missing all the day-to-day happenings that make life worth living.

Anyway, I haven’t always loved this place. But this, this I might miss.

Here’s to intentionally making the effort to live in the present in 2016.

 

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You Don’t Need To Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt

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“You just need to love with everything you have left. It will be enough.”

Thought Catalog

momothexplorer momothexplorer

You can’t treat every love like it’s your first. First loves are for learning. You learn to love in a way you didn’t know was entirely possible. You start to believe that love is something you’ll experience, not just hear about. You trust that someone else might want to take the time to get to know your weird quirks and complexities, and they might even love you anyway.

Everything is new. And you, however unintentionally, feel bound to whoever opened you up to this. You feel closer to them than anyone else who has ever shown a romantic interest. They exposed part of you, they showed you how much you have to offer.

And when they’re gone, you stop being reckless, open, and excited. You no longer have the ease of knowing someone else’s reactions, their humor, their body. You’re at square one. Again. Except this time with you’re…

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What The Beginning Of A Relationship Feels Like After The End Of So Many Others

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This is brilliant and everything I want to say right now.

Thought Catalog

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After a certain amount of time, there is a rhythm to falling in love.

You meet someone. You fall mercilessly for them. And it works – for a while. You carve out those memories – the ones that seem so unique to just you and that one other person: The way they’d kiss you with firm hands and eyes open. The highway that you’d drive down with the windows down and the radio cranked. The way they’d wrap their arms around you at night that made you feel as though the entire world was safe and serene for just a moment. You fall easily into the tranquility of combining your moments with somebody else’s because it feels like you can trust it this time. Like it is going to be okay. Like you can stay there.

Except you never can. It’s not always planned or deliberate. It’s not always harsh…

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How To Love A Girl Who’s Guarded

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This is so lovely.

Thought Catalog

via Summer via Summer

You won’t know when a girl is guarded, not initially at least.

“Guarded” won’t be the word that comes to mind. You’ll think she’s independent and confident. Driven and seemingly content. She’s never seeking anything from you, never leaning in to the hint or the whisper. She seems as though she lives a big life, and it’s in that paradox that she’s most closed. She’s filled all the little spaces with something, something else.

Once upon a time she fell in love the way thousands and millions of people do every day and hour and in the last three seconds while you were reading this. But it wasn’t the falling in love, or the breaking up that ultimately broke her.

It was that she found the truest seeming, most divinely timed, so evidently fated love, only to learn that conviction is not actually an indication of what will…

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something new

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Check this out people!

robinsonandy12

I’m not sure what I want to write about now, but  I felt like I should write something. I guess a question came up in my head tonight: why can’t we just call things like we see them? Look at a child who barely has a grasp on life and is still learning, they ask questions and say what they see. Why can’t we do that?

I came up with a few reasons why

  • Our thoughts are best kept to ourselves in some situations,
  • We don’t think things through well enough,
  • Most importantly, we are afraid.

In a recent event of change in my life, I felt like I was stabbed in the back by someone I have known for quite some time now. Yes, I am still a bit bitter on the subject and will remain to be for a bit longer. I handed someone trust and it just got…

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Something that I miss.

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My posts have been so heavy lately. Because my thoughts have been a wonder storm and I haven’t quite known what I was thinking until I read it later on. But I thought it was definitely time for a lighthearted post. Again, thanks to a prompt I found on Pinterest.

The prompt: Something you miss.

Impossible to name just one thing, so I’ll name a few.

I miss how it felt when I was little and had $20 to spend on vacation. I felt wealthy and privileged. Now, I wonder how long $20 is going to last.

I miss the way it felt running through the sprinkler in the back yard. I felt like a fancy little model in my one-piece bathing suit. I would frolic around in the water like I was a dancer. My dad would hold me right over the steady stream and I would shriek and laugh my head off.

I miss high school dances. Having filthy feet, ruined hair and disgusting amounts of sweat. But the biggest smile and the best time just dancing with friends as if we didn’t have to go back to school Monday and be normal people again.

I miss spending my summer days at my grandparents’ house. Making a mess, eating candy, and going to the playground with grandpa after he got home from work.

I miss the way my dad and I used to say goodnight, touching our thumbs together- our secret thing.

I miss Saturdays spent simply playing with my brother. And I miss reading Junie B. Jones and making him so mad by not showing him the pictures on purpose.

I miss going to my old church. It was so tiny but at the time, I was so small that it all seemed so big. I would sit on the heater vent in the sanctuary to keep warm on cold Sunday mornings.

I miss friends who eventually went separate ways.

I miss the simple, beautiful moments of being in love.

I miss simplicity.

Basically, I miss the times when I could be a carefree child. When my mistakes were smaller, my expenses were smaller, my problems were smaller, my worries were smaller.

Don’t get me wrong, growing up has its perks. But the nostalgia I have for the days that came before is overpowering sometimes.

What is one of your favorite childhood memories? What’s something you miss?